Love: Want An(other) Extraordinary One?

After a long, cold winter and now an equally long, rainy spring, I am ready for some warm weather and this weekend has not disappointed. It is hot! Summertime hot! Warm weather often turns people’s hearts towards love, especially those currently without a romantic relationship in their lives. Having a great relationship often tops many people’s lists for creating a life they love.

However, past experiences have many of those same people questioning the likelihood of experiencing a great love. So, today, I am starting a new series on relationships beginning with a post on hope of a great love, even another great love. This series consists of reposts from our newsletter A Stitch in Time. I hope you enjoy it whether reading for the first time or second!

For Those Looking for Love:

“What you said gave me hope,” Tara said. She was in the audience the night before when Reggie and I had shared about handling baggage before and during a relationship. Her comment took me back. 

I always knew that I was going to be married. What I did not know was how long it would take to find real love, (or should I say for it to find me), or the pain that I was going to encounter along the way. What I also did not know was that love and marriage are not necessarily the same thing.

When Reggie came into my life, I thought I had already experienced twice what I called a “great love” — both passionate and romantic. I did not think I would (could or should) be entitled to yet another “great love.” I believed that I would love again, but not a “great love,” a “comfortable love.”

I didn’t have to give up my hope of a great love, just my definition of love and how I went about finding it.

God showed me differently. What I had to give up was not my hope of great love, but my definition of love and the ways in which I went about finding it.

That is what I did. Right before Reggie came into my life, I decided to change my ways when it came to relationships. I decided to do it God’s way. That meant that before entering another relationship, I spent time alone with God. It was the best decision I ever made. I had been alone before. I had even spent time with God before, but this time was special. This time, I understood the wonderful gift it was to be alone with God. I understood that singleness was a gift, and since I knew that I would one day be married, it was a gift that would one day go away. So, I decided to make the most of it.

Wherever you are, make the most of it! This is a key to creating a life you love. #CreatingALifeILove Click To Tweet

I made this decision, not because I am super spiritual, but because I was tired of the pain of unfruitful relationships. If I was going to do it again, I needed it to be different. So, I needed to be different. My time alone with Him allowed God to heal me and change me. Ironically, Reggie had also come to the same decision after his last relationship. God used his season alone to heal and change him too.

I am not super spiritual. I was tired of the pain of unfruitful relationships. #CreatingALifeILove Click To Tweet

In time Reggie came into my life and we had a great love. It all began with a decision to do relationships God’s way. That experience left me with more hope than I ever dreamed possible. One February night, our hope became Tara’s hope. It is our prayer that if you have lost hope, our hope can become your hope because that is part of what this blog is about.

If you enjoyed this post, check out the rest of my summer series on relationships.

Summer Series on Relationships:

• Part One – Preparing for a relationship by spending time alone with God.
• Part Two – Some tips from my late husband Reginald Sanders on how to spend time alone with God.
• Part Three – Who should take initiative in a relationship and when.
• Part Four – Protecting your significant other’s tender spots and vulnerabilities.
• Part Five – Getting your priorities in order.
• Part Six – Healing past pain.
• Part Seven – Overcoming trust issues.
• Part Eight – Overcoming fear.
• Part Nine – Valuing women.
• Part Ten – Honesty in a relationship.
• Part Eleven – The cause of your discomfort.
• Part Twelve – Your beliefs.
• Part Thirteen – Believe quickly.
• Part Fourteen – At the heart of good relationships is friendship.
• Part Fifteen – Real, genuine brothers and sisters-in-Christ.

Questions:

• Have past relationships impacted your hope? If so, how?
• Are you afraid to hope because of past hurts?
• What can you do to overcome your fear?